Nearly one year has passed since I decided change everything...my apperance, style and the way of thinking ....and face with the truth which I lost 3 years to find the way out.
I try to smile more than I did before... But now when I think that I can give a happy smile with everyone even I get hurt inside, once again they woke me up..... why everytime I face with them I can not even give a social smile with easy to do ....only get hurt and tears.I thought that I can control it and keep all memorize of past somewhere deep in my mind by fill my mind full with a lot of interesting things I did day by day.... but today I found out still I can not .... all memorize from past come back full on my mind and very clear ... like I can see it real....
As usual I called my friend who always go out somewhere with me on occasion like today.... So I had lunch with her and her boyfriend.... Thanks Mai, she always understand whenever I call her and go out with me in urgent....Don't need to ask me much about the reason, coz she understand and she is the only one I can call and I know that she will have time for me.....Just this year my friend before you're get married ... I will face with it alone, that is a promise.
To finish a day long before I go to my Iaido class..... there is only place I like to go when I'm being alone.....at least I feel better and forget it in few hours......
By the way, I never feel stressful even hard work all day long .... but only 1 day off at home with them like today it made my mind was so tired by thinking a lot ....
Thank to them who help me realize that I need to be stronger and stronger more than I did everyday....Feel better now and ready to have a new plan soon as I used to have last year...... execution is always the most interesting part.......
Try your best Wenny...think -> action -> make it real !!!!!!!!!!!!
From
My weakness part today only
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